December Babies

December Babies are interesting creatures.  They are so fun, that no matter when they come, they take the shine off Christmas with their brightness (or the anticipation thereof).  Perhaps that's because all those silly priorities like, making Christmas candy, shopping, decorating, are not nearly as exciting or precious as a new little one.  As I am (within the next 12 days) to have two December babies I am finding it funny that with James Christmas wasn't important because I had a new baby, and now with this little guy I find myself overlooking Christmas entirely in anticipation of not only my new baby, but also of not being pregnant anymore.

And as I've been thinking about this strange December baby phenomenon, I've been thinking of another December baby, the very reason for the season.  If instead of being shoved into the background of the Christmas rush, he was the true focus, I wonder if Christmas would look or feel the same for any of us?

That said, I love December, I love babies, I love Christmas, and I am so excited for my soon to be 2nd December baby!

The Best Part of Unemployment

As we all know, the best part of unemployment is the end of unemployment.  We have entered into the best part of unemployment, in that it has ended (twice actually).  Spencer accepted a job with Alorica in their tech department, with the intention of getting a supervisor position quickly out of training because he was quite overqualified for the base level and it really wouldn't meet our income needs.  Two days into training, however, he got a call from a recruiter he had interviewed with over a month previously offering him a much better job.  He talked to the people at Alorica and when they heard how much he was being offered they practically said "Run, what are you still doing here."  Thus, Spencer has a great new job with Select Portfolio Servicing in their Bankruptcy department.  He was hired specifically for a bilingual position, so he'll get to use his Spanish--gotta love the blessings of serving a mission. He is learning a lot and really liking his new job.  The best part is the pay is better than his old job at Academy Mortgage and the benefits are better and cheaper.  Also, he gets to carpool with a friend in the ward who works there too (which is cheaper, helps him get to work early, and is better for the environment).  Hallelujah!  Another great thing is that while he was unemployed we were still able to have health insurance, due to qualifying for medicaid, and I am going to continue to be covered by them which means at least most of our baby expenses will be paid for, which is such a relief.  We also qualified for food stamps which helped us re-stock our empty larders.  All in all, life is wonderful.  We will be playing catch up with finances for a little while, but that is an adventure all in and of itself.  For the moment I keep looking at some of our dwindling resources and hoping they are like the widows barrel and let me just keep scraping from them for a little longer.  Hurrah for employment!  Hurrah for being able to pay the bills!  Hurrah for Spencer and his awesomeness!  And hurrah for life and all its fun adventures!    

Life

I realized today I haven't posted for a long, long time.  Life happens, and time just keeps rolling on whether you're ready for it or not.  I have been reflecting over the last year, and if you just look at the bare facts it would seem like it's been a really rough year.  Between Spencer being unemployed last year, me having a really rough 1st and 2nd trimester of pregnancy complete with 10 weeks of IV therapy, and Spencer being laid off his job last month (three months from the debut of our new little boy).  But I have a hard time thinking of it as a hard year, it has seemed so wonderful and been so full of joy.  I guess that is the beauty of God's plan, that we can find joy even in difficult times.  I really feel like God has been so good to us, and I have no doubt that He will continue to watch over and take care of us.  Yes, money is tight, and yes, I have no idea what the future holds, but I feel positive that it is full of good things to come and it is (even now) full of great and good things.

I love being alive!  I love waking up every morning knowing that I have a sweet wonderful husband who loves me, an adorable little boy who brings sunshine to my soul and a healthy little baby boy on the way.  Yesterday felt kind of dark and gloomy (talking to Wells Fargo can do that) but today is full of promise.  I know this post is a little scattered.  What it really comes down to is I am finding great joy in my journey, and I hope that you all are finding joy in yours.    

Miracles Never Cease

This evening, at 8:45 p.m. approximately, Spencer and I bolted into the car and drove our little baby boy to the hospital.  He had been climbing and fell (on his eye) onto the pointy latch piece of our dog kennel door.  He was screaming bloody murder, and crying blood.  His eye was already swelling shut, and, all in all, it did not look good.  On our way out the door Spencer gave him a blessing and we sped (literally) to the hospital.  The staff where super helpful and got us right back to a room, and a doctor saw us within 30 minutes of our arrival.  At this point our sweet, wonderful boy was no longer crying, but playing with the remote control on the hospital bed.  Miraculously, the point missed his eye altogether and it appears that his vision will not be at all affected.  Further miracle, his tear duct also seems to be unharmed and the cut on the inner part of his lower eyelid was small enough to avoid sutures.  In essence, James miraculously has a super swollen eye, a small cut, and no serious damage to his eye.  I've been using the word miracle a lot, but it is a miracle!  For the way he fell, and the object he landed on, there was no possible way it could have been better. He could have easily lost all sight in his eye.  I know God was watching over my baby and keeping him safe, and I am so grateful that my little James will walk away from this with nothing worse than a really nice shiner (which of course he will show off to his friends).  How wonderful is it that we have a God of miracles, and that those miracles aren't stuck in antiquity, but they are in the here and now for us and our families!      

The Lord's Timing

I could sum this post up in five words.  I won't, but if I were to sum it up the words would be: God is smarter than me.  Now those particular five words could probably sum up almost all of my life, but I will relate how they are applicable now.

Spencer got a wonderful new job after three months of unemployment.  Were those months hectic? Yes!  Did I constantly waffle back and forth between being faithful and questioning the Lord and his timing? Yes! Did God know best? Of course he did!  Spencer's new job is with Academy mortgage.  He is working in the  IT and Tech department.  He makes four dollars an hour more than he did at his other job, he finds work more fulfilling, and he has a very high likelihood of promotion and even better pay within a year and a half.  When things work out so well (and they always do) it makes a person feel really stupid for questioning The Almighty.

I would like to say that this incident has cured me of questioning the Lord's timing, but being human, I can't say any such thing with certainty.  What I will say is "Hurrah for the Lord and His goodness in watching over me and my little family!"

I've been thinking a lot about the Lord's timing lately.  Not only that His timing is better than mine, but also that if indeed God's timing is better than our own, which it is, than we ought to be able to relax and find more joy in our lives, knowing that God is in control and that all things will work out for our good.  I have decided that when the Lord said "men are that they might have joy" he wasn't talking about when there are no problems, but about right now (this very minute).  Having joy now, no matter what the circumstances.  It seems like a wonderful goal...and an even more wonderful outcome.  I am working towards believing and living in such a way that I can have joy in each moment of my life.

Taking a Step in the Dark

Two weeks before November started Spencer called me on the phone and told me that he had written his two weeks notice.  We knew that it was getting close to time for him to leave the credit union, where he has worked since before our marriage, due to some revelation and heartfelt prayers a couple weeks before.  Neither of us were aware, however, that the time was coming quite so quickly.  I, of course, asked him why he had written his two weeks notice, and he responded that he had had a very strong prompting that it was what the Lord wanted him to do.  I said a quick prayer in my heart and responded "Well, I guess you'd better turn it in then."  That day he turned in his two weeks notice, not having filled out a single application and having nothing lined up for when his job ended on November first.  Together we took a step in the dark, trusting that the Lord would take care of our family.  I have always heard that sometimes we need to take a step in the dark, but I never imagined having such a literal experience with this principle.  We left behind the security of a steady income and some amazing insurance, and stepped towards the unknown.  The strangest thing is we both felt entirely safe in doing so, for the Lord had promised that He was with us.  It has been a truly humbling and eye opening experience.  After a couple of days my faith began to waver, but every time I have sought the Lord, He has comforted me, telling me to "be still, and know that [He] is God."  I cannot speak for Spencer, as I am not Spencer, but I know that this is helping me grow closer to the Lord and my Savior, and I believe that he is having a similar experience.  I sometimes feel like Peter, jumping off the safety of my boat and onto the water to walk towards my Savior.  Sometimes I feel confident and faithful and my feet never falter across the waves, but when I allow myself to look around at the stormy sea I begin to sink.  It is then when I call out to my Savior to rescue me, and every time He has come and spoken peace to my soul and placed me back on my feet.  As I keep my eyes upon him I am able to move forward towards whatever awaits beyond the restless sea of unemployment. Spencer is now in the process of job hunting, and it is a stormy tempestuous sea if ever there was one.  I do not know what God has in store for our family, but I do know that He is mindful of our situation, that He loves us, and that He has a plan for us.  It is comforting to know that the Lord of the whole Universe is mindful of us.  I sincerely hope that our journey through this mysterious dark tunnel is a short one, but if not, I know that everything will work out for our good, and that the Lord will be with us each step we take in the dark.  

Love

I have decided that love is the most powerful thing in the universe.  Today I feel both loved and loving, which by the logic presented in the previous sentence gives me great power.  Some of the love I've been feeling today (or at least the expression of said love) has been slightly humorous, and some has been meaningful and deep beyond what I can adequately describe with words.

This morning I was playing and laughing with my baby boy.  I do this often.  It is one of my favorite things to do.  At times while interacting with my baby a very powerful love just sweeps over me and fills my whole being.  I love my son so much.  He is one of the most precious souls in the whole world and he's been entrusted to me!  Today as I was filling as if I may burst with the love I have for my son I found an outlet in singing.  I began to sing "I love you like..." adding strange new versus such as "I love you like fires love flames, like parties love games...and so on.  It is strange how that song seemed so corny in a romantic way, but sing it to your baby and it is perfect (so long as you change the "I want to marry you" line to "it is completely true" or "oh, yes I really do").  I sang that song most of the morning, coming up with many new versus and all the while feeling that I could not possibly feel more love than I was feeling at that moment for my sweet baby James.  Then, later in the day, when I saw my Spencer and gave him his "Hello, welcome home from work" kiss I felt that same level of love only slightly different.  It is such a strange and incredible feeling, like loving at your maximal capacity. And in the moments where you are loving at your maximal capacity it is hard to imagine being able to love more.  Thankfully God can increase our capacity to love and be loved, which brings me to the amazing conclusion of my lovely day.

As hinted at above, I came to a great realization this evening.  It was not an earthshatteringly new idea, but today it sunk deep into the depths of my very soul--leaving me feeling loved beyond measure.  The idea (or belief) is this: I am of infinite worth; redeemed by my savior and unquestionably worth it.  The savior didn't look at our sins and us and decide hmmm... I don't know if this one's worth the pain.  The savior knew we were of infinite worth, children of God. Because of that knowledge he was willing to undergo the atonement, and suffer for all of our sins, our pains, and our heartaches.  Thus, making it possible for us to return to the presence of our father, the God of all the universe.  What an amazing thought.  Infinite worth, worth beyond measure.  That is the value our savior and heavenly father have placed upon each one of us, and thus it is, in fact, our value.  Whether or not we feel worth it we are, because God says so, and what God says is.  As I pondered this and let it really sink into my being I felt what can only be described as a heavenly hug; a divine manifestation that everything I just thought about was true and that my Father in Heaven was pleased that I had finally come to fully realize what had always been true about me.

It has been a lovely day and I hope that you have felt some of the love, as I've shared the story of my wonderful day with you.

Finding Peace 35 feet off the Ground

Tuesday Spencer and I had the awesome opportunity to go to ropes course together as part of our Power 90, which is a 90 day system Spencer and I are doing.  There were many things about it that were simply amazing!  I feel stretched, but in a way that is good and fulfilling and will lead me closer to the things I want.  Sadly, I have no pictures as no one in our group brought a camera.  Thus, I will attempt to describe the experience in such a way that makes having pictures, or the lack thereof, irrelevant   

In preparation for ropes course we were asked to find our greatest limiting belief.  I went not knowing exactly what my greatest limiting belief was.    However, when we set our intentions, at the very beginning I knew that I wanted to find a way to make the peace and joy I feel at times my norm, and I wanted to find a way to not fall back into my individual pits of despair.  I also went bound and determined not to do the trust fall, as I knew we were doing one, and I did not want to do it.  That's the preliminaries and from their the day began.

The first exercise we did was called "traffic jam" and in this activity we learned that there are three steps to solving a problem, namely: trial and error, finding patterns, and creating efficiency.  It was meaningful to me because I usually start out expecting myself to be at the third stage of doing everything efficiently, which is more frustrating than effective.  Our next exercise was about guaranteeing our results.  It was awesome to see our group come together and really work towards what seemed an impossible obstacle.  After that we did a trust lift (which was done in silence) and then a trust fall.  As mentioned before, I came to ropes course fully intending on not doing this activity, as I have seen too many people be dropped and I had no wish to be one of them (and let’s be honest I just have a hard time trusting people).  Despite this,  I didn’t even protest when my turn came to do my trust fall.  I climbed to the top of the pole.  I stood there for a while, conversing with my inner guru who said "You can do this."  Jamie, our facilitator, said, “Mailee, it’s time. You can do this.”  Then I fell backwards, and they caught me.  Spencer gave me a great big kiss of which everyone was quite envious ( and to which Spencer would like me to note that he had "deviously" positioned himself in order to do so) and I just laid there knowing I had just taken a huge step towards trusting people more fully and more openly.  It felt like freedom and relief, all at the same time.  Following that we got to state what our next big step to our goal was (on a giant swing).  

Lunch came at this point which broke very calmly into the jam packed action of the rest of the day.  It was a great time for reflection, rest, and getting to know the other’s in the group better.  Lunch is over back to ropes course.  

After lunch we climbed the wall, which was frightening and awesome, all at the same time.  My only note on this even is that it is amazing what our self talk does for us physically as well as psychologically.  I was a support person on top of the wall, and it was really interesting to see people as we were taking them over the wall.  They would be making progress and getting up, then they would say “I can’t” and following such a statement they couldn’t. The energy just faded and their muscles no longer had the strength.  However, our last man to go over had given about all he had at that point, and he was running on nothing.  No one was boosting him.  His only support was Spencer and I sitting on top of the wall trying to help him pull himself over.  And then when he thought he couldn’t do it he said “I can do this”  and from somewhere deep within he found the strength to get over and it was remarkable to see the difference that that self talk made both for good and bad.  

The most meaningful part of the day (for me) came next.  Thus, I am dedicating a whole paragraph to it.  I believe this activity is typically referred to as a "leap of faith," but I’d rather use the phrase coined by one of my favorite Wamplers “Jump off the freaking pole.”  Probably because the whole idea is to climb to the top of something roughly the size of a power pole and jump off towards a trapeze. This was a really remarkable experience for me, as I climbed up this pole with nothing but a harness.  I was the last to go and I was a bit unsure about the whole thing, but determined to give it my all.  The climb was not terribly difficult, but at the end of the climb I got to pull myself onto a small wooden platform (about the size of kitchen tile) and after pulling myself onto it I was supposed to stand up.  My momentum had been carrying me up there, but as I knelt on the platform I realized in order to stand I had to look straight at the ground which didn't really leave any doubt about how high up I was.  As I looked down I felt a panic rise  in my chest and a voice in my head started shouting “Can I really do this.”  I collected myself and stood.  The pole was shaking, due to the fact that I was shaking.  Standing alone on a small platform connected to a telephone pole 35-40 feet off the ground, I was very afraid.  Then from below I heard my facilitator say, as he had said for no one else, “Mailee, I want you to balance and have the pole stop shaking.”  I attempted to stand straighter, but the rope was pulling me.  I asked if they could loosen the rope at all because it was pulling me.  They told me I would have to shuffle forward as I was at the back of the tile sized platform.  I was terrified, but I obediently shuffled forward and then I attempted to balance and stop shaking.   Below Jamie, my facilitator, said “find your peace.”  I breathed in deeply and cleared my mind, and an amazing thing happened.  There, atop a power pole standing on a tiny platform with only enough room for my feet, I found complete and utter peace.  The pole beneath me stopped trembling, becoming utterly still.  From below, Jamie asked “What are you jumping for?” as our jump was a representation of what we were willing to risk and work for in our lives.  I replied that I was jumping “for consistent peace and happiness in my life”.  He then asked what I was giving up to get it, to which I replied “FEAR.”  Then from below I heard him say “Jump and grab that trapeze (which was very far away and was the physical embodiment of my purpose).  At that moment I knew I wanted it, and because I wanted it I moved forward to the very edge of the platform with no fear.  I jumped, reaching for that trapeze with all my might.  I didn’t catch it physically; however, as it was just a physical manifestation of my desire, I did catch it mentally.  Mentally, I grabbed that trapeze and did a set of chin-ups followed by a very artistic jumping dismount.  The person who came off that pole was not exactly the same person that climbed it to begin with.  After jumping for what I wanted and leaving my fear behind I became someone who would no longer let fear dictate my choices or my state of peace and happiness.   It was truly powerful!  Although the most powerful part came the next day as I spent the entire day in a state of complete and utter peace.  In that state I accomplished more, felt more gratitude, and got to experience a deeper love and appreciation than I had before felt for my sweet little James.  I learned on top of that power pole that if I could find peace there I could find it anywhere I wanted, anytime I wanted it.  

I loved ropes course, and I loved that I got to share it with the love of my life, Spencer.   

Three Wonderful Years

This week Spencer and I celebrated our 3 year wedding anniversary!  It was wonderful, but very different than how we are used to celebrating.  Having a baby now makes more than a day away a bit difficult, but we found a babysitter and enjoyed a day together at home...mostly.  We got and had breakfast, took James to the babysitter.  We then went rock climbing where Spencer climbed his first ever 5.10a wall (for those of you non-rock climbing nuts it's a really difficult climb).  I did not climb my wall, but I attempted three times and on the third time I made it past the part where I had been getting stuck.  My arms where shaking so badly at that point, however, that I decided to call it a day in the rock climbing department.  We dropped by the babysitters so I could feed James.  Then we came home and ate some Papa Murphy's take and bake pizza (it was delicious).  For the rest of the day we played games and just enjoyed each others company (and some tasty treats like ice cream!).  It was super chill, super relaxing, and super fun, basically our day was kind of a reflection of our marriage, chill, relaxing, fun, and full of love.

 Strange to say, as we've only been married for three years, it is really hard for me to remember what it was like not to have my best friend and eternal companion in my life.  It feels as though we've always been together, and always will be.  Maybe it has something to do with the nature of eternal marriage that once you are sealed your marriage spreads forwards and backwards to fill all eternity.  Whether or not that's how it actually works that's how it feels.  I love my eternal companion!  I love my Spencer!  Happy Anniversary to us!


I am so excited for all the years to come that will continue as they started, with us walking hand in hand to confront whatever it is this life has to offer us together.  

Scout Widowhood

I am happy to announce that I am no longer a widow.  "Wow," you may think, "I didn't know you ever where a widow."  But to all those thinking that I will reveal to you that I was, in fact, a widow for exactly one week due to the wonderful and worthwhile departure of my husband to scout camp (wonderful at least for his scouts).  At the beginning of my week I had absolutely no plans and thought that it would be a nice quiet week in which I could accomplish a lot of projects.  However, God knows what we need better than we do, and in his tender mercy he filled every minute of almost every one of my days with some activity or another.  It made my scout widow experience bearable.

The most difficult part about my week while Spencer was away was sleeping.  There were a couple of factors that aided in making it difficult to sleep. 1)Now that fireworks are legal in Utah people feel the need to set them off weeks in advance of Holidays and this was the week before the fourth of July; when one's nerves are already a bit on edge random booming noises going off at unexpected times don't typically help. 2) We have no AC or Swamp cooler so in order to cool our house down from the blistering hot 88-89 it typically gets up to during the day we open all the windows at night.  That really is two things that make it difficult to sleep the heat, heaT, heAT, hEAT, HEAT, and the fact that all my windows were open to anyone who wanted to pop out the screen.  3) Spencer wasn't there providing protection comfort and support.  So, with all those natural sleep inhabitants most days during this week I stayed up till four in the morning and was woken up by my son at 6:30.

I could write much more about the week, but suffice it to say it was busy, it was sleep deprived, it was exhausting, it is over.  I am so glad my sweet wonderful husband is home!  Hopefully I will have forgotten enough about how much I missed him to support him in his calling and let him go again next year.  

PSA ~ perfection addendum

My dear Blog followers,

This is a public service announcement from your loving and devoted Grand High Chief Enforcer to the Great Dictator of all that is Familia (aka Mailee).  Greetings and otherwise salutations to all the minions, wayfarers and far-travelers of our beautiful Familial Realms.  It has been a long time since I have sent my greetings and encouragement to you via this means, and as such I deem it necessary to do so.   The Great Dictator of all that is Familia has recently told you of the perfection that she has achieved and I am here to add to that statement.  She has neglected to tell you that she is perfect in her role as The Great Dictator of All, and that although for such a great being such works as she has shown in this artistic medium may seem humble, they are but a shadow of the awe inspiring things to come.  Please remain attentive in your labors, and active in your pursuits of the ultimate goal we hold common.

With firm affection,

Your Grand High Chief Enforcer and Regent of the Familial realms,
Sir Spencer formerly of Scary


For those of you who don't know my husband very well, and don't feel like attempting to decipher old English phraseology, that was his way of saying he loves me and thinks I'm wonderful and that he wanted to inform you that there are many more great posts/pictures etc. to follow in this The Pyper Familia Blog.

Perfection

There are many perfect things in this world.  One of them is my new title, complete with pictures.  Now the reason that I know that it is perfect is because my perfectionist self has been working on the exact placement/color for the past hour, and while most people could have called it quits and been satisfied with something different I could not.  So, dear followers, I hope you enjoy my perfectly awesome new title.  Laura Wampler showed me how to get pictures into the title spot and I am so glad she did.  Yay for perfection in blog titles!  Now it goes without saying (although I just went and said it) that there will come a point when I will no longer think my title is perfect, and when that point comes I will change it.  But for now I am glorying in the perfection of my humble creation.

James

My son is probably the best and cutest baby boy ever to roam the earth (and if that sounded like a reference to the dinosaurs, it was).

James loves to smile.  He glances up at you and gives the most adorable grin ever at least 10 dozen times a day.  One of the most meaningful times I had as a mother was when James had terrible croupe and bronchiolitis and simply could not breathe (basically he was so sick it was heartbreaking), but despite how sick he was and how terrible he must have felt whenever I would come to his crib in the middle of the night to check on him (which was often) he would look up at me and give me that adorable smile.  Those were some of the moments when I caught a glimpse at the strength and valiance of the spirit that dwells in the body of my little boy.  He really is one of the most happy, easy going children I have ever seen.

One of James's largest interests currently is food.  James WANTS FOOD!  We have been feeding him solids for over a month and a half now and he loves his eating time.  When he stole a pickle seed (and enjoyed eating it) at 4 and half months we decided it was time for some food for the child.  He still tries to steal food whenever anyone is eating and he's been known to throw himself towards whoever happens to have food at any given moment, but he is mostly content with his humble fare of baby food, though he will be happy when he can eat what everyone else is eating...which, sad to say will be a while.

James makes life fun.  He wants to move so badly and is getting really close to being able to do so.  Once he learns how, Watch out World, nothing will be safe from inspection and or being chewed upon/eaten.

Motherhood: Re-learning to be Passionate

I am passionate about being a mother.  I always have been, and it has always been something I wanted to do.  Despite this, in my few months of motherhood I was having a seriously difficult time.  The reason for this is that I felt like despite how much I wanted to be a mother when the opportunity finally came I felt inadequate, and that, all in all, I was not cut out for motherhood.  I hid my insecurity as best I could and moved on with life, but it was constantly gnawing at me.  Then I attended a seminar called: The Power of Choice in which I learned how to replace those feelings of inadequacy with the feelings of being powerful.  I also learned how to reignite the fiery passion I have for being a stay at home mom!  It has been wonderful!  The dishes often aren't done, the floor often isn't clean, and James does cry on occasion.  However, I no longer feel that these things are a reflection of my inadequacy, rather that they are a manifestation of my choice to take care of and play with my son, as well as taking care of myself instead of having the picture perfect house.  It is truly liberating.  I love being a passionate mother!

As I was re-reading this post I realized there were some serious grammatical errors (which I have since corrected).  That's what comes of being a passionate mother.  It is really easy to loose your train of thought, and your well constructed sentence, when peeking around your computer every other word to play peek-a-boo with your baby...

Baby James is Alive and Kicking (literally)!

As is obvious, by the fact that I haven't posted in a little while I've been a bit busy, with my new little baby boy: James Edward Pyper, who we called kicker post delivery and now call buddy more than anything else.  However, I am trying to make a point of addressing him by his name so he will know what his name is.  But that is all besides the point.  I am sure that you all want to know about delivery and then, if I had a guess I'd say you wanted to see some pictures.  Well, I'll see what I can do.  I am partly documenting this for my lovely followers and partly so that years down the road when I have ten children (heaven forbid) I will still remember the story of having my first.  So, without any further ado the story of the birth of the cutest little boy to grace this earth (I'm not biased at all).

I premise this tale with the fact that doctors should not tell you you're likely to have a baby any day.  A month before I was due I went into my doctor and they said I was 80% effaced and dilated to a 2+, which, in their words, meant "this baby is probably going to come early."  I freaked out.  I was not finished with my last class yet, and there was no way to finish it up within the next week or two due to a class project that required other group members.  I emailed my professor and got permission to do an individual project.  Two days later I was finished with my last class and for all intents and purposes graduated with a bachelors and teaching license in Special Education: Emphasis in Severe disabilities.  Voila, I thought I am ready to have a baby...well as ready as I was going to get.  The next week I was dilated to a 3, the week after that a 3+, the week after that my doctor greeted me with "I can't believe you haven't had a baby yet."  Bah, where is the baby.  The next week I have still not delivered and was not really having any contractions worthy of note.  This is one week before my baby is due, my doctor was very surprised, and I very perturbed.  I hate waiting, but even more so when professionals keep telling me I should have to wait no more.   This week I was dilated to a 4 and my doctor was looking for any sort of reason to induce, but I'm as healthy as a pregnant horse could be and was sent home with again the assurance that I should have a baby very soon.  My blood pressure had been a tad high, thus, I was told to check it a couple times a day and come in to labor and delivery if it reached a certain level.  I checked it on the morning of December 13th, one day before my due date, it was high.  I call Spencer to tell him I was going in to get it checked out, but that he didn't need to come to the hospital since they probably would just monitor me and send me home.  Kimberly, Spencer's sister, picked me up and went with me to the hospital.  They hooked me up to the stork monitor and low and behold my blood pressure was beautiful, beyond beautiful 90/50 kind of beautiful (my body just loves behaving for the pros and misbehaving for me).  My doctor had them check my amniotic fluid, while I was there.  It was low, not dangerously low, but low enough for them to induce me.  I was asked if I wanted to be induced then, or if I wanted to wait for tomorrow when my doctor could do the delivery (as it was getting close to time for her to go home and she was not on call that night).  Well I wanted a baby, so I said "Please, induce me."  I had just told Spencer that I was going to go home 15 minutes previous, so I called him again and said come to the hospital we're having a baby.

They moved me to another room where they hooked me up with an IV to give me Pettosin--which I have no idea how to spell--and broke my water, and finally I was having contractions.  Kimberly stayed with me until Spencer got there and a for a little while after he arrived.  I wasn't sure if I wanted an epidural, because I figured if it isn't too painful why have to deal with numbing.  The contractions continued to build, and they were painful though not unbearably so, the pain was just not where I expected, it was centered in my lower back and spread from there up and down my spinal column.  Now I thought to myself, "Self, you can probably deal with this and be just fine, but do you really want to feel this if it's possible not to."  I asked the nurse if I could have an epidural, and in no time it all I was chilling, unable to feel my legs at all and feeling no pain whatsoever.  I hung out for the next few hours.  At one point (when they poked him in the head as they inserted an internal monitor) the baby's heart rate dipped and a whole bunch of doctors and nurses converged on our room, but everything leveled out again quickly.  Spencer's mom came in and sat with us for a little while, but went back into the waiting room for the actual delivery. I pushed for an hour (which is really hard work even if you can't feel the pain and my whole body was shaking like crazy).  Thus it was that six hours after checking in at 10:22 p.m or 22:22 military time James was born.  He was bright purple for a minute or so (he had the cord loosely wrapped around his neck), and he had a bit of a cone head, but even then he was beautiful.  He weighed 7 lbs 11 oz and was 19" long.  He had his eyes open and was looking around a few minutes after he was born and he is still a curious little fellow.  Spencer's parents came in shortly after he was born to see their new grandbaby and take pictures.  We went to sleep very late and woke often while in the hospital, where we saw many of our wonderful friends come to congratulate us and see the new edition to our family.

We came home from the hospital on the 15th and I started a new chapter in my life: Motherhood (about which I'm sure to say more in later posts).

All of the above pictures were taken about 15 minutes after James was born...wasn't he cute at 15 minutes old.

Craziness

I have to remind myself on a nearly basis that I am not insane.  This may sound a little foreboding, and or like I'm losing my mind (which I may be).  I just didn't realize how much I was getting in for when I decided to work full time, take classes, move into a new house (and try to organize/arrange said house) and be pregnant.  I come home exhausted, start on my homework, pay the bills, attempt to clean (which takes a lot longer when you can only bend certain ways due to an ever expanding stomach), and think to myself that I am crazy.  I then remind myself that I had good reasons for deciding to do each of the things I am doing and that I am thus not insane, just potentially a little too ambitious.  Spencer and I are finally not living out of a suitcase anymore, as we unpacked our clothes and put them in the dresser last week, this is in part due to my grandmothers appalled expression when we told her we had been living out of a suitcase for two months...familial pressure, even more effective than peer pressure.  All in all, in all its craziness life is pretty great.  A bit fast paced, and if the last sentence is any indication a little to full of all's, but wonderful.

Behind the Times

I am going to be a quarter of a century on June 3, which is next Friday.  This makes me wish to pause and reflect on my life.  In my lengthy reflection (all of 30 seconds or so) I decided that I take a little longer to do important life things...graduate...marry...have kids.  I am a bit behind most of my friends and loved ones in these and other areas.  However, I always catch up eventually.  I got married at 23 not a world record, but I certainly wasn't early in the game.  Spencer and I are in the process of looking for a home (as we've been pre-qualified for a mortgage).  I am, finally, going to graduate in December.  And not long after that (or before graduation as fate may have it) I am going to have a baby.  I have been going crazy wanting to tell everyone about my life changes, especially about my little one who is moving around rather vigorously, but haven't.  I told myself that I wouldn't tell anyone until 14 weeks, but at week 11 my resolve is crumbling.  Thus, I have now documented the fact that this is happening without officially breaking my word to myself as all my faithful friends--followers of this blog-- may not even read this before week 14.  Life is wonderful.  Thanks for sharing my news, or not, as the case may be.

Senioritis

I have a very severe case of senioritis.  I can't even begin to describe how much I want to be done with school already.  I am currently waging an inner war with myself, as part of me just wants to drift through the rest of school, do a little less than the minimal amount of work, and be happy in my laziness.  But the infernal good student that seems to have lodged itself in my existence just isn't satisfied with that.  This goody goody two shoes self insists that I must do all my homework and attend all my classes, and not only must I do all this work, I must do it well.  So in essence my life consists of trying to not do my homework, not wanting to do my homework and then doing it anyway and being upset that I used up so much time to do it.  Its a fairly conflicted and stressful way to live.  I wish I could just decide to be a lazy or good student and just do it, but I have a feeling that I will continue to do both at the same time.  In one of my time wasting (not working) fits however I managed to watch Around the World in 80 Days with Peirce Brosnan, which I did not even know existed.  Apparently it was a BBC miniseries some years back.  There are a couple of risqué scenes, but it was all in all quite delightful...skip France and the trip around the world was perfectly worth watching...even though I should have been doing homework...

Fall Pictures

Now, there are several reasons for posting these now instead of when they were taken in the fall.  Reason one, in the dead of a nasty, smog infested, Utah winter it is nice to remember that there are warmer and more colorful seasons at some point in the year.  Two, they are the pictures I used on our Christmas card, thus they have integrated themselves into the Winter season.  And lastly, I like them, and it's better to post them now rather than never.  And with that lengthy introduction here they actually are:

It's very important to have a kissing picture (otherwise people would wonder if you still like each other).

I love this picture for several reasons.  One my hair looks awesome, and two Spencer looks awesome.  The last reason is it's just a good picture.

I'm peaking at you from behind Spencer, and he's trying to figure out what I am doing.

This was the fastest photo shoot I've ever had.  We took pictures for a grand total of fifteen minutes, and we got some really good ones.  

Happy Fall/Winter!

New Followers

I began this blog as a means to personally motivate myself to document my life... From the overwhelming amount of posts, you can see how effective this motivation has been.  Now, however, some of my dear friends may be following my family blog...perhaps documenting for them will be more successful than just doing it for me.